Action Figures - Issue Two: Black Magic Women
“Matt says. “Sounds like your mom got lucky.”I am not a punchy person by nature. When someone says something upsetting to me, I endeavor to take the high road. If it’s something particularly offensive, something that presses a hot button, I might respond with an insult or two, maybe a well-placed F-bomb. I prefer to use words that hurt rather than fists. Because I’m civilized.Matt’s comment prompts me to leap the width of the Wonkavator and drive my knuckles into the meat of his upper chest.“OW!... What the hell?!”“Don’t you ever say anything like that about my mother again!” I scream in Matt’s face. “My mom did not get lucky, and if you say that again I swear to God I’ll put my foot so far up your butt you’ll need Stuart to get it out!”“Sorry, dude,” Stuart says to Matt, “but I ain’t touching your butt.”“God, Matt, do you have to blurt out every stupid thought that comes into your head?”“Come on,” Matt says, “don’t tell me it didn’t cross your mind.”“It didn’t, because that’s not what happened,”MoreLess
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